I have had some inquiries about my lack of posting. It was never my intent to take a break. Sometimes life just happens. One issue is that my laptop stopped working.
Chuck tried to repair it and it didn't work. He then spoke with an IT guy at work who gave another suggestion to try. He said that with what Chuck had already done if this didn't work then it was dead. Sadly, it is dead.
That means I have to use the desk top and by computer standards it is a dinosaur. It is a real pain to upload the pictures to blogger using it.
Quite frankly I am feeling weary.
I understand life is meant to be a blessing and a challenge. I am feeling the challenges at the moment.
One thing that has made me weary is all of the politics. It seems every where I turn it is coming from all sides. My dad has a saying that your opinion ends where the other guys nose begins. I am ready for people to tone it down.
We are also having an issue with our septic system. Sewers are coming to our area and we were hoping we could hold off. A phone call was made and we aren't on the sewer schedule yet and who knows how long it will be until we are. Our septic system is original to our home which was built in 1953. Unfortunately all signs point to a failing septic.
I am doing laundry at my parents and we are taking quick showers. We are doing all we can to prevent it from failing before we can get someone out here to check it out. If we need a new system it will be very expensive. We are in prayer asking for an answer that doesn't involve a new system and for the funds to pay for all of this.
I believe I may have mentioned that Megan's little school ends at 6th grade. We always knew we would need to make a decision about what would happen after that. An announcement that her current teacher, who teaches a 5th/6th grade combo class, is retiring at the end of the school year has changed things. The school is trying to make a decision based on enrollment and funds about whether they will have a 6th grade class next year.
That prompted us to go ahead and make a decision about the direction of her future education. We have thought about another private, Christian school, public school, and homeschool as options. I made the mistake of putting a question about a neighboring school district stating that the district we are in isn't a good fit for Megan on FB. I opened myself up to some nasty things. I deleted the thread because it caused me to receive a couple of very hurtful private messages.
It is easy for people to judge your decisions and tell you what decisions are best for you. An example of this is my father-in-law (who we have never discussed this issue with) informed Chuck in a phone conversation last night that we need to put Megan in public school. That it is best for her to be put in situations that will cause her to have to deal with real world issues. He also stated that I need to get a full time job and that having children in care programs is good for them. Chuck was upset by the time they ended the conversation.
The thing is Megan is timid and has her own unique personality. Putting her in a group of 500 + kids isn't going to make her more social and outgoing. She shuts down when she feels overwhelmed. We see it at birthday parties and such.
Many act like we are taking this decision lightly. Certainly not. We did discuss it with Chuck's mom and step-dad while having dinner with them. They are supportive no matter what decision we make. One of the big issues is that I am a people pleaser. I have a strong dislike for conflict and I want people to be happy with me.
We are 97% sure of our decision for future schooling. I received a call from the school principal last Thursday about an incident at school. It involved a 6th grade student sending a text to a girl in class that mentioned "69." Megan was not involved, but the principal did talk to all of the 5th/6th grade girls as a group to see if any other inappropriate comments had been made to the girls.
That ended with me having to have a difficult conversation with Megan. As soon as I told her Mrs. W had called me and I asked her what she talked to the girls about she started crying. Hearing your little girl say she told us that a boy sent a "sexual" text to another girl in my class about ripped my heart out. Then we had to have a basic conversation about sex. Certainly not a subject we intended to discuss at this point.
Now I have spilled more then I probably should have. I hadn't even told my mom about this and we talk about almost everything. It served as another reminder that even if you have your child in a Christian program it doesn't mean that everyone holds the same values that you do. It reinforced to us that we have to be diligent at being involved and aware of the things Megan is exposed to.
So friends, that is why I am feeling weary. As a "friend" pointed out in her private message to me I live in a bubble. At the moment I am fine with my "bubble." I have enough to manage in my own world without the issues of the outside world in my face all the time.
I am learning that what is important is that I obey God, my husband and stand by our convictions. I will never please everyone and as long I am pleasing God, Chuck and myself that is what I need to do. Others will always judge the things you do and someone will always be there to tell you they disagree with your decision. As Chuck's step-dad said "you are adults and don't need approval from anyone for the decisions you make." Easier said then done for a people pleaser, but I am trying.