This post has been on my mind. As I was reading what Monica had written I keep thinking "I could have written this."
I have most definitely been in survival mode. I do not like it one bit! I started thinking am I living each day to the fullest? No. Am I providing a positive, loving, fun environment for the kids? No. I have been short with the kids and just "surviving" until nap time or until the weekend. Is this how I want to live, is the how I want the Megan to remember her childhood? Of course the answer is no.
Chuck and I have been talking about this. I told him how overwhelmed and frustrated I sometimes feel. I told him that when I step back and see how things are I know that my actions are not glorifying God. Ouch! That was hard to admit.
I have noticed that my days have been much better. I have had the mindset that I was not just going to survive, I was going to thrive. When I feel myself becoming short I pray. Pray for patients, pray for guidance.
I know that I am too hard on myself. That I want things to be perfect. I really need to let that go. I relaxed and made sure that I sat on the floor and sang songs with the kids, read stories and just enjoyed my time with them. Of course I do these things everyday, but much of the time I am thinking about how many things are still on my to do list.
I know that this is something that I will have to work on each day. I feel so much better when I am thriving. Thanks Monica for helping me to see that I want to thrive, live today and not wish my life away.